SLC Layover

What’s wrong with this picture?

I know there's something wrong but I can't quite place my finger on it...

O.K. I think I have narrowed it down.  Is it the fact that there is a cat in the airport?  Or is the shocking part that there is a cat in the airport on a leash walking around wearing a sweater?    

How about this picture? 

Yep, it’s a pug.  You know, the small, fairly worthless dogs that have a hard time breathing which causes them to snore louder than fat old men.  Well, this pug is proudly being touted as a service dog by his two even more proud dads.  Oh yes, that is a man.

Airports are an amazing place.  A mix of all walks of life.  Presently I’m staring at a 55 year old man proudly wearing a leather biker jacket, checking his email on his smartphone wearing Velcro shoes…it's all very, very confusing.

There’s a woman proudly being driven through the airport because she’s too heavy to walk from one terminal to another.  I’m pretty sure the walk would do her well.  Unfortunately I don't have a picture because the cart was weaving through pedestrian traffic.  But then again, it's probably for the best.

There’s a group of burka clad women standing in the middle of terminal C.  As people walk by it is obvious that they are not trying to look but you can’t hide your eyes.  Almost every pair strains to the side as they pass, innocently making sure there’s no funny business going on. 

Classic America sits down next to me.  Well, half of them.  The real looker sits on the floor and shakes her hand at what must be her parents.  The arm fat sways long after the hand stops shaking.  I can’t help but notice that she’s wearing a wedding ring…it must be her husband sitting by her side with a semi retarded look on his face.  A comment that would normally sound insensitive but in this case it is the most accurate description one can make.    It’s here that I start to wonder how long the two have been married.  If this guy can find a wife, anyone can...

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Helpful Improvements (aka bitch session)

#1 (oh yeah, there's more than one!  This is what happens when Delta and Alaska Airlines completely screw up my flight home.  I'm still in Sun Valley...More on that later.)

Try paying a bill or asking your cable or energy company a question (looking at you Excel, AT&T, Sprint), or better yet try contacting someone who works for United, American Airlines, Cheap Tickets or Expedia.  Yes, I'm directing this at all of you.  Please tell me that this isn't way too familiar; you call looking to pay your bill and you end up listening to the following, "we are sorry, there is an unexpected large volume of calls right now.  Please stay on the line and the next representative will be with you shortly.  Your patience is appreciated." What does it tell you that I was able to recite that from memory!

If there is ALWAYS an unexpectedly large volume of callers, doesn't the large volume eventually become EXPECTED and shouldn't they DEAL WITH IT?  Call me crazy over here...  You claimed that you farmed out customer service to call centers to "better serve" the customers.  But i'm not naive, the real reason was to cut costs.  This leads me to my next, and yes somewhat obvious but equally brilliant comment/request.  Why doesn't the automated voice service that asks for ALL of your personal information, D.O.B., social security number, address, mothers maiden name, if you have any birth marks in interesting places... record this information somewhere for the representative you are eventually going to talk to?  Furthermore, why can't they pass on the information to the next customer service representative once the first person you are talking to realizes that they can not help you?  I don't think the first person I have ever talked to has been able to fully help me.  EVER.  You?

Here's one of the HELP ME, HELP YOU moments i'm so fond of.

Imagine how much time can be saved if the customer service representative didn't need to repeat all of those questions?  On an individual basis it's pretty small, but if you added up all of the calls they take in a day, week, or month and it quickly becomes the mathematical equivalent of A SHIT LOAD!  With all of the added time they have they can answer more calls.

How does this help them?

Think about how much nicer people will be if they don't have to wait on hold and answer the exact same questions they just struggled through while talking to an automated machine?


#2

If I didn't know better I would assume that it was part of Obama's job creation program, but it's not.  I'm talking about the 2 or 3 TSA people at every airport terminal exit making sure people are only exiting. This truly skilled (see Newark airport fiasco from last week where someone slipped back into the airport AFTER making a scene and was actively being watched by TSA security) job can probably be replaced with a one-way turn-style found in many NY subway stations.  This alone could save the airports close to 100K a year.

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Email Evolution: The "Unsend"

Font size...Check

Font color, bold, italicize...Of Course

Undo...For Sure

Hyperlinks, lists, bullets...Why Not

spell check...STANDARD


Sending a letter has come a long way since the days when you had to lick a stamp and envelope.  Email has made all of us perfect spellers and cured even the most illegible handwriting.  But even with all of these great advances, email still lacks one small but greatly important feature.  Lets call it the "unsend" button (and funny enough, I just got the red squiggly line I depend on to correct my atrocious spelling.  I guess "unsend" isn't a real word...YET.)  I'm sure everyone has experienced the sickening feeling that comes with a preemptive push of the send button.  It can come from forgetting to include an attachment, noticing a misspelled word, or even being way too honest after a couple glasses of wine.  But whatever the reason, the technology to unsend an email, if and only if the recipient has not opened it should be available.

Google has made a small step in the right direction with a 20 second undo window...http://gmailblog.blogspot.com/2009/03/new-in-labs-undo-send.html

But I need more.

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The Importance of Friends and Family

It's the holiday/new year's season so I bet a lot of you are thinking that i'm about to write some sappy post about how much I love my family and friends and how important their support over the last year has been....but no, no, no.  I'm going to take an entirely different approach to the importance of family and friends.  It's a social commentary on the advantages someone has purely based on the family they were born into.

YOU ARE WHO YOU HANG OUT WITH

I was recently having a conversation with a successful lawyer about his son who was recently accepted to Stanford.  I'm sure he's a bright student, finishing second in his high school class (i wasn't aware these statistics were released, but i wasn't going to question him) but what really interested me was his essay question answer.  He explained that his sons essay was a comparison of music lyrics to his life and how the lyrics either influenced or mirrored his life and I'm not going to lie, I was impressed.  I can guarantee you that my essay questions for undergrad were well inside the box.  I asked how his son thought of the idea and to my surprise, he admitted that it was his brother's idea.  And this is what made me think (to myself of course) IS WHY FAMILY AND FRIENDS ARE SO IMPORTANT.  The mere fact that he put himself, through his own accord or not, in contact with educated people helped him come up with a great idea, that probably helped him get into one of the premier universities in the country.

Let me explain...

Throughout life you are influenced by the people around you.  As a child your vocabulary is almost purely a function of what your parents say.  You are a sponge whether you like it or not and some people are more fortunate than others to be surrounded by educated and successful people.   But the advantages don't stop there.  How many times have you heard the saying, "it's not what you know, it's the people you know."  There's a lot of truth to that saying and it all shouldn't be looked upon negatively.    People attend college and graduate school to make connections and I have a number of friends that have helped other friends find jobs.  Should all of these people be judged negatively?  I THINK NOT!  There's a limit to how much these so called connections can do for you without you taking on the onus to present yourself in a proper, intelligent, and likable manner.  The door is opened a lot of the time because of these connections but you need to seize the day (carpe diem, if you will) and walk through the door.

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