Get out of Work Free Card

I'm pretty sure the Swine Flu is turning into the ultimate get out of jail and go directly home, do not pass go but still collect $200 (paid vacation time). Now is the time to sneeze or cough at work and tell your boss that you are feeling under the weather. You might want to set it up a couple days in advance but that's up to you. Citigroup professionally disinfected it's NY office after an employee reported flu like symptoms. All I'm saying is that one man's (or world's) problem can turn into your advantage.

Let's just keep this all in perspective. Over 36,000 people die a year in the US from the flu. I'm going to hold off on the panic button until there is a legitimate death in the U.S. from the swine flu (I'm a big fan of the name). The news agencies were looking for any way to sensationalize and spread panic and fear. After all, fear sells papers (and the newspapers need all the help they can get at this point - (Internal meetings...BRING ON THE SWINE FLU!) The only death from the swine flu in the US was a Mexican boy visiting relatives in Texas. Call me when a 26 year old from Colorado dies (was that too cynical?)

My classic plan if shit really hits the fan is to move the the Caribbean. Just thinking about the perfectly white sand beaches and crystal clear water with colorful fish puts a smile on my face. It's hard to find someone who lives there that isn't happy and willing to chat. So I'm expanding my reasons for packing up my stuff and moving to include a worldwide swine flu pandemic. I'm not crazy enough to leave for a couple 100 measly deaths. I'm talking about a million plus deaths. This isn't completely unrealistic. The 1918 Spanish flu pandemic wiped out over 20 percent (a conservative estimate) of the worlds population. Put into perspective, 20 percent of the worlds population is over 1.3 billion people. And the flue wasn't just a European problem. Over 600,000 people in America died. So, with that being said I certainly hope that the swine flu doesn't become a serious pandemic BUT in the event that it does, I'm out of here. Carribean/British Virgin Islands...(maybe Virgin Gorda in particular) Here I COME.

P.S. Thanks Pat and Matt for calling me out on the lack of posts! I needed it.

Update: 4/30/2009 2 confirmed cases in Colorado were reported - i'm starting to pack my bags.